Genealogy Chat

I've been searching on FreeBMD for some deaths this evening and, although I've found quite a few, I am very depressed by all the babies there. On one page, there were eleven deaths and the oldest was five years of age.

It get's me every time too. It must have been awful for the parents. My Great Aunt lost 5 babies, some of them lived until they were 2 years old. I got so depressed that I had to stop looking. I understand what you mean totally. Sheila

Totally agree,we thought my grandad was the eldest son born 1901, his parent's were married 1894, guess what ifound when i started this 3 babie's before him we did'nt even know about, then 3 more that nobody even talked about, let alone knew about. How sad, prayer's and thought's to all my family past, presant, and future, and to all on G C Shan

Some of them had the same names as my relatives and were in the same registration district. It's sad because they could be mine and I'd never know - I can't order shedloads of certificates on the off-chance.

Yes you all are right........times were hard in those days, either the mother wasnt nourished enough, or conditions were not right..........my great grandparents had 12 children, including two sets of twins,(none of which survived,) of which only FOUR matured to produce children of their own. Also they moved around a lot, because practically every birth was at a different address........Bob

Kate, You may be able to find out if any are of your family by looking through the baptisms and burial registers in the parish records for your area. We have found several babies this way, which we wouldn't have known about as they were born and died between census. Some records really touch you don't they. I remember looking through banns for c. 1916 and the vicar had written across the entry that the groom had been killed in the war, R.I.P. I know it must have happened quite alot but I just felt so sad seeing that.

Hi Kate and everyone Yes, I have found so many sad deaths in my tree. My GGran had a first born son who no one knew about, was brought up by his Gran, and although didn't die as a baby, died at the age of 22, but the poor woman also had another son die at the age of 3 who I found on the 1891 census, otherwise I would not have known, and yet another die in 1906 at the age of 3 also, and this was just a year after her first born died. Sooo sad. I also have a family who had 12 children, and out of the 12, only 6 survived! I am in the process of getting birth and marriage certs in at the mo, but when I get round to the death certs, I can't wait to find out what they all died of!!! I also have a mother called Zilpha, who had a child called lilian Zilpha who died, then went on to have another called Lilian Zilpha, and then died herself, at the age of 34!!! I have yet to find out what happened to the latter Lilian Zilpha child. Lisa xx

What is also sad to read is that when you do get the death certificates of those young ones, they died of illnesses which are often easily curable today. Medicine has come a long way.

I found two children both called John William who died young. One was my father's mother's brother, who was 2 yrs 5months old (she was a baby of a few weeks so would have no memory of him). The other was my father's father's brother, who was 10 when he died. My father's father was 3. I knew there had been one child that died young, but didn't know anything else. There were 10 children altogether in that family and the next boy born was called John William too. My great-grandmother also lost a baby aged 5 weeks and my mother says apparently she was pregnant 9 times but only had 3 children who grew up.

My gr grandmother had 17 children four died within weeks of each other with diptheria 2 others died very young with what i do not know ,the strange thing is once a child died and they had another they tended to call that one the same name ,so i have rellies who died young and some who lived to a good age with the same name confussing!!!!!!! Val GC

I know how you feel. When I was searching for siblings of my grandfather, I suspected there was one missing, as my great-grandparents seemed to have babies at regular intervals. I found a son, Edward, who died at the age of three of diphtheria. It really made me sad, even though it had happened in 1896. As far as I know, he was the only child to die, so in a way, they were lucky, considering the infant mortality rate at the time. I have also been told that my grandmother had still-born twins in the 1920s, I will try to find out more about them from the stillborn register there is a thread about.

I found out that my Grandmother was the youngest of a bunch of thirteen children. Just her two brothers survived, the rest died either at birth or not long after - three sets of twins included. Just think how large my family would have been if they had all survived - yes makes me feel quite sad. Linda

What sad stories, My Gt gt grandparents lost 3 children out of about 9. one son was 12, and 2 daughters one was 10 months and the other daughter saddest of them all was 1 week and never even had a name, on her birth & death certificates she is down as the daughter of George Bindley and her surname is given but where the box for the childs name to be added there's just a line and no name. This broke my heart the poor child didn't even have a name when it come to adding her to my tree I couldn't bring myself to put unnamed female so I just put her down as Baby. Michele

Kate + all replies Just be glad we live in our present age! But perhaps the most important question we should ask is, if these infant deaths had not occured, would many of us be here now? Most families suffered the same, with much higher infant mortality in not so far off times. But if these siblings had survived, what impact would that have had on any particular subsequent family history and our own existences? Ian

I know how you all feel especially as I'm an ex nurse,these poor little babes all died of illness' and conditions that today would never have taken their lives.My grandparents lost three children one under 1,another aged 5,and another of 17,all with simple conditions,it's so sad.But then my daughter in law and son lost 3 babies all in late pregnancy in the last 10 years,so very,very sad.We all say they were too special to live in this wicked world. I'll finish now as it's such a sad topic, Regards, Elaine

Ian, I know what you mean. My mother was pregnant a year before she had me but lost it. If she had had the baby, I would never have been conceived as my elder sibling would have been 5 or 6 months old when I was born.

Yes, I have felt the same. I was shocked to find in my line there were three boys born in a row, dying one year after the other and all given the same first name. I suppose life was so much harder then that people accepted this sort of loss but it would be much more than we could cope with.