Genealogy Chat

Fiona, What a wonderful Christmas pressie for you and your mum! I too am sitting here crying (and I'm at work!!!!) I hope everything works out for you and your mum, God bless your lovely husband! Julie xxx

Fiona What an amazing outcome to your story. I'm genuinely happy for you - bought a tear to my eye reading it. Of course it's going to be a shock for both your mother and your grandmother to find out that the other is still alive - butr hopefully given a little time to get used to it they'll hav ethe opportunity to meet and spend as much time as they can getting to know each other. Do keep us posted on how they're getting on with everything (and you of course - you've had the shock of finding a new grandmother as well). Zoe

Thank you! Jackie, Helen in Berkshire and Jay. Margaret........Yes I told my mum her mother was still alive, I called her as soon as I had read the e-mail.........well after I'd read it the forth time. Hard to tell how she really took the news over the phone, she was a bit quiet, shocked I think. i had talk to her in the past about her possibly still being alive........glad i did now because at least the thought was there in her head. I'm going to give her a bit of time to let it all sink in then I'll call and see how she is. Merry.........It did take me a while to open the e-mail. My husband asked as soon as I went on my mail if I'd got any thing, I said yes and he asked what they said. I told him I didn't know as i hadn't opened it yet, I just sat here looking at the name. He told me i'd never know if I didn't open it, I clicked on it and we read it together. Only got through two lines and i was in tears. I don't remember being that nervous in my life! Feels wonderful now though!! Fiona.

Fiona, I am sitting here with tears rolling down my cheeks, having been moved by your thread. Well done to you - I am so thrilled for you. I hope and pray that your story will have a truly happy ending. Your loving and supportive husband sounds wonderful too. All the best for the future. Jay

Three cheers for hubby!! Hip hip!! Hooray! (etc) Merry! - (PS - This is Soooo exciting, but also so nerve-wracking for you...I keep imagining you facing opening that email......)

Hi Nell, Yes Fiona Colgan is FC........or FC is Fiona Colgan. I know getting to 87 she has to be fairly tough but it still worries me, I think we'll leave if and when to tell her to her other children after all they know her and if she'll be able to cope with it. I will be keeping my fingers crossed though!! Hi, Merry, Dea and Helen, Thank you for your kind words and support. I am just so happy today and wanted to share my news with you all as this is where I am almost every day and I just knew you'd all be just as happy for us. Yes I'm in America but my mum lives Shropshire, as it turns out not too far away from where her mother ended up settling. I am visiting my family in June but my lovely wonderful husband has told me not to worry if I end up needing to go home sooner the ticket will be there for me. I'm so lucky to have married such a wonderful man, I've been on the computer so much over the last year and a half and he even made it easier for me by getting me a lap top so I could take it anywhere in the house with me. He's not even complained about all the money I've spent on searching indexes and getting certificates. I just wanted to give him a mention as he has been so great and I don't think I would have been able to get through it without his support too!! Fiona.

Fiona Have you told your mother that her mother is still alive? If so, how has she taken it? I too missed this thread originally. I have just told my daughter about it, we are amazed. Wishing you all the luck in the world. Margaret

Congratulations, Fiona! I too have only just seen this thread, but well done for how you've handled this delicate subject, and I hope you and your mother reap your just reward for it! Good luck and best wishes for the meeting with your grandmother when it happens. Helen

What a lovely story Fiona. I am so very pleased for you. Thank you for sharing it and good luck to you all. Jackie x

Fiona, I've only just read this thread (obviously missed it before) Oh my gosh!!!! I have goose bumps all over! What a great story! I really hope it has a happy ending. How terrible for your Mum to have believed her mother was dead for all these years, it must be a real shock for her to say the least. I really hope you and Mum get to meet your Grandmother/Mother in the future. I think this story should be on the Jeremy Kyle show! All the best and let us know what happens next and well done for all your 'digging' efforts! Helen x

Shall we have a collection for a ticket back for you?? Merry

Oh ****** Fiona!! What a frightening thing for you to have to deal with.......are your grandmother's other children talking about telling her??? Where do they all live? In the UK (I know you're not!) I have a fluttering tum just thinking about this........... Very best of luck! Merry

Oh Fiona, I am SO happy for you AND your mum, AND your new family members - I followed the thread at the beginning and thought you handled things very well and very sensitively - I wondered if you had told your mum and if you had got any further forward. Again, even though this is a very exciting find and very emotional for you - It is obvious that you are still considering the feelings of the other people involved, especially your elderly grandmother. I am sure you will handle things just as thoughtfully from here forward and feel confident that ALL your family will be happily reunited in the near future - thanks to you.! They should all be very proud to have you as a family member. Please let us know how things evolve. Very best wishes, Dea x

I am confused - are Fiona Colgan and FC Michigan the same person??? Whatever, FC I am pleased you have made contact. I understand your feelings, but remember that if you've survived to 87 you must be tough! She also knows that she had a child and was upset about her, so this leads me to think she would be really glad to know how things have turned out for her. And its not even Christmas yet! nell

I have given my mother all the details I found a bit at a time over the last weeks, she was shocked and is still even now trying to come to terms with it all. Things really came together yesterday! With the help of a Genes member who turned out to be an ex in-law of who I found to be my mums brother that she new nothing of I got an e-mail address for who turns out to be my mums niece. I sent an e-mail to her yesterday and this morning I got an e-mail back!! I was so nervous and it took me a while to click on it, don't know why it turned out to be the nicest e-mail I've ever received. It turns out my mum has 3 sisters and 1 brother, they did know they had an older sister only they never knew much about her as their mother was always too upset to talk about her. She said her and her mother were so please that we'd managed to find them. It feel so great to final be getting some answers, it really was the nicest e-mail. She has said her and her mother are going to sort through the family album and send pictures of the family for my mum, my mum will finally be able to see what her mother looks like!!!!! The vauge story the sister has from other family members was that my mum was taken from her grandmothers garden while her mother was working, from things I have learnt about my mums dad and his family it really does not surprise me. The really big thing from the e-mail was that my mums mother is still alive!! She is coming up for 87, they haven't told her yet not knowing how painful this could be for her and I have to admit as much I would like to meet my grandmother the last thing I would want would be to cause her any harm and at 87 I'm not sure if anyone could handle all this. Don't want to kill her off now we've found her. This has been a great morning and the best Christmas Present I've ever had.........if I could only stop crying long enough to enjoy it. One very happy Fiona!!!

Hi Fiona I have been following your story and I think it's very sad. I hope everything turns out alright. It's is going to be heart breaking for your mum when she learns the truth. But one thing did cross my mind and that is when you eventually show her the copy certificates she will see the date you ordered them and will then realise that you have known longer than you let on (if you get what I mean). So you might have to order more copies or explain that you had known for a while but wanted to let her down gently. Best wishes Angela

Little Lil, Thank you!! Olde Crone, Yes the divorce would have taken place about 1845 give or take a year or two. I have applied for a copy of the divorce, once I get the absolute and know which court it took place in I should hopefully be able to get a copy of the full papers(might need mums help for that bit). Thank you for the insight into divorce back then, might explain why her mother couldn't see her. Your right, the lies my mother was told as a child over sixty years later have hurt her and I know she's going to feel more hurt because it upsets me to and I'm not the one who was kept from my mother.

If I have got this right, your grandparents would have been divorced in the 1930s/40s? If that is the case, your Grandmother would not have stood a cat in hell's chance of being allowed any access to her child. When the 'guilty'party was a mother, the Courts were utterly vicious. Custody was always given to the father and the Courts often instructed that the Mother should have no access and indeed could be prosecuted if she even attempted to contact the child. With this in mind, and given that your mother was told her mother was dead, she could hardly have received birthday cards or even letters from a woman who was supposed to be dead! Remember also that 80 years ago, people were much more in awe of Authority - your Grandmother may have wept many bitter tears over this, but was too obedient and fearful of the Law to do anything about it. Your Mother, as her (presumably) oldest child, is entitled, I THINK (correct me if I'm wrong) to get a copy of the Divorce Papers. And for what its worth, yes, I totally agree with you, your mother has been lied to enough. A salutary lesson to all those who choose to lie to small children, without thinking the consequences through, for their own ends. Olde Crone

Just to let you know that I'm thinking of you and if there is anything I can do please let me know.

Hi Janice, I thought of that and think it highly likely, they lied to my mum about her death and if she did send letters I'm sure they would have kept them from her!! Fiona.