Genealogy Chat

correct me if I am wrong......but I believe Carol is actually in touch with the Local Newspaper and a GR member is/ has been in touch with Lambeth Archives, and Southwark local studies and they are all in support of bringing this to a happy conclusion .....Lilly

Athena, You ask if I am reading your replies. Are you reading mine ? I state that it is right that the possessions should be reunited. I simply feel that the way you are going about it is improper. You must however do what you feel is right. Write to the children, it has been 60 plus years, another few weeks will make no difference. I am sorry that my comments are regarded as negative. I am simply drawing from my own Father's experience. A complete stranger ringing you up to enquire about your love life 60 years ago. It beggars belief , it really does .

Lilly Yes I believe Carol has spoken to the newpaper and someone has contacted the archives, but I don't think either are aware of how far this has been taken.

Again, good points Patrick - but in the case of an 86 year old a few weeks may matter a great deal.

Jeanette - we may not possess the suitcase ourselves but we know who has it. And since they have no intention of following this up, we have. If this call should prove to be the right family then my main aim is to give them contact details of the Lambeth Archives so that they can, if they so wish, follow it up with them and find out if there is a way of having some, if not all, of the personal things returned (at least those pertaining to Mr Boley). I suppose you could say we are acting as go-betweens - from one neighbour to another, putting them in the know so they can decide what to do. I'm not interested in poking my nose into their personal life or past. We've learnt enough about that through the Press coverage and all I would like is to know that if Heinz is out there that he is made aware of it all - I feel it's his right to know. That was all.

Lily, How do you know this gentleman won't be upset. Do you know him ? This really is farcical . Not an iota of thought has been put into this. The words ' Bull ' and ' China Shop ' leap to mind

Yes, thats correct, Lambeth can hardly refuse to return someones personal belongings can they.

Patrick Ive missed the boat twice not getting in touch with someone straight away and they took their information to the grave, I missed contact with them by a couple of weeks, to be told later on they would have been so pleased to have made contact! One would assume that youve never had this problem, lucky you! Having read the thread it is being handled with care and a great deal of thought, all of us need a little encouragement even when we know we are doing the correct thing. Perhaps its fate...and the two need to be brought together.

Athena I still think it would be good manners and ettiquette to speak to the newspaper and the archives first. Are they aware of how far you have got with your discoveries? Have you given them a chance of approaching Mr Boley themselves? Please don't sacrifice an old man's feelings for the sake of a bit of glory for yourself

I believe from these thread that the Newspaper has actually asked for a copy of these threads to be send to them, as they would like to do a 'follow up story' We even joked about all the free publicity genes would get.....as a after thought, when my sister and I were sorting my dear late mum's things out. in her underwear drawer were a rather large bundle of letters, written by her fiancée who died in 1942, she later married my dear old dad. the point is, my mum had kept these letters for over 60 years, even though she was married and had 'moved on' with her life, she still had a place in her heart for her first fianc'ee....my sister even has the engagement ring!!! .......Lilly

Well! I have been working all day, so only just caught up with the latest developments. Normally, I am ultra-cautious about approaching people about their past and always feel that slow is better than quick. But for once, I dont feel that - this gentleman is 86 and time is on no-one's side here. He may be senile, he may even be dead, he may be aware of Herta's fate and not care anymore - but please dont lets consider treating him like a child. He has an absolute right to know about this, after all, everyone who read that local paper knows about it, and so do we. It is insulting to say that he should be protected from any hurt - I suspect this man has been through more than any of us, but let those who know him decide that. I do not think this is prying into an old man's love life, I think it is giving him the chance to know what happened to Herta, if he doesnt already, and to reclaim his letters.It would be absolutely unforgiveable if we, who know, decided not to pass on this information - how dare any of us decide what is best for a stranger? I shall be on here tonight, to hear the outcome! Olde Crone

Olde Crone I couldnt agree more

Good luck with the phone call. I think that is the right thing to do. Deb - (Awaiting the outcome with bated breath)

If he is frail or ill his family will censor the information but do give him the chance to know about this. As I said before my dad would have been so pleased if it had been him. So often in his last few months he would sit there naming people who he once knew so well when he was young and wondering and pondering what had become of them. I tried all the forces reunited sites for him but I guess they had already gone - after all dad was 91. What joy it would have given him to have found just one person he remembered as a young man in those war years. Or even to have to have just learnt about them albeit that they had gone.

I've been following this thread with great interest and am reminded of a similar story which became a book called 'Hannah's Suitcase'. I wonder if any of you have read it? It's a truly wonderful story about a suitcase that was on display in a Holocaust Museum in Poland and was sent on loan to a museum in Japan. The suitcase had the name Hannah Brady painted on the side. A techer in Japan and her students decided to find what they could about Hannah. It was amazing what they found, family photos of Hannah, paintings that she had done, but, sadly, they also found out that she had not survived Auschwitz. They did, however find a brother of Hannah who had survived and was living in Canada. When contacted he was overjoyed to find out that so many people had cared about the fate of his sister and that her memory was immortalized in a book. Margaret

I quote : ' It is insulting to say he should be protected from hurt ' May I ask why ? I entirely agree , ' How dare any of us decide what is best for a stranger ' , a wonderful sentiment. It is such a shame that you have all decided to do just that. I made a very simple observation : The family should be contacted in writing , not by a member of Gr but by some suitable authority, that is the right, proper and decent thing to do. You are glory seeking, it is shameful, absolutely bloody shameful

Patrick I am not a young woman, but still not quite as old as Mr Boley. However I can tell you I would be ABSOLUTELY b*****y FURIOUS, if someone had found information such as this about me and then decided I was too old, frail, dotty etc, or 'might get upset' and then withheld that information. It is insulting to ASSUME that an 85 year old man is 'too old, or too frail'. From what little we know of him, he must have been tough. But as, I said, let his family decide. Glory seeking? I guess you must be a fairly new member, there is no glory seeking here - who is going to get the glory, and who from??? You are perfectly entitled to your opinion. So is Mr Boley. Olde Crone

Hi OC Errrrr......don't look now but it appears Patrick joined on the same day as you!!!!!! Although I do think Patrick's posts have been a little abrasive, I do believe his heart is in the right place. Because of the way his replies have been worded people may have missed the point that he is trying to put across........that he believes the suitcase should be returned but by using the the original channels, ie. the archives or the newspaper, in the first instance. If neither are interested, then a carefully worded letter to be sent by a GR member. And I must say I am inclined to agree. Please let's not turn this into a slanging match just because people have differing views Jeanette x

Patrick, I really cant see who would be glory seeking? Everyone just wants to see a happy ending - how would they receive any glory in this. And the thing is would a 'proper authority' even bother to put pen to paper over this - I doubt it.

Well, Patrick may indeed have joined the same day as me, but I don't recognise his name as a regular poster. My comment about him being a new member was directed at his unpleasant comments that people on this Board are only doing this 'for the glory', assuming that if he was a member of longstanding, he would know the hard and unselfish work that many members do for other members on a daily basis. The people who have been involved in this search are the people who are on these boards every day, helping people find their ancestors. Not much glory to be had there, and quite often not even a thankyou. Of course, any search that anyone does into their family history, is intrusive in a way and I am impressed by the majority of members who 'withdraw their services' when a search does appear to be too intrusive, or they feel that the information may be misused to the detriment of a living person. I dont want to get into a slanging match either, and in fact, wasnt aware that I was! Olde Crone